It's totally acceptable for you to get out on Saint Patrick's Day and celebrate in true American fashion. You can throw down the proverbial gauntlet and slam shots of whiskey until you're cross-eyed. I hope you remember to wear one of your Irish green tee shirts, though, or you are going to be in for quite an irritating evening. Every time I go out to the bar on St. Patrick's, I see a few folks scattered in the crowd wearing the same clothes they always wear. With no green on, everyone knows you're susceptible to pinch-attack.
All of this was a surprise to me, of course. I am a genuine-article Irish import. I cam here when I was a wee tot back in the yonder years of the 90's when I was naught but 7 years old. Okay, enough of that old-world talk. I'm pretty glad my folks moved us here when they did, because if it had been any earlier we would have been forced into the Union Army or made to carve railroads out of mountains, or something equally terrible.
St. Patrick's Day is a traditional Saint's Day in Ireland, which means it's strictly a religious holiday. We don't eat corned beef usually and we don't feel the need to wear green Irish tees. We have parades in the bigger cities, but we only really do that because of the American influence to do it. In Ireland, we have a special Mass for St. Patrick and the rest of our day is pretty much the same as every other day.
I guess it must be a capital crime in America to come to school on St. Patrick's Day without wearing green. I had no clue that this was traditional in the U.S. at all. I just showed up with my usual cheerful expression on March 17th and found the whole classroom wearing silly Irish tshirts. I froze in my tracks, because I honestly thought the whole class was making fun of me. That's when a boy laughed and pinched me while yelling something about not wearing green. I cried and I left for the day, refusing to go back to class despite my mother patiently explaining everything to me.
I tell you all of this because I want to ready you for a possible storm of pinching on Saint Patrick's Day. If you slip up and forget to wear your Irish drinking tee shirts, then you are setting yourself up for some pain. Drunk people are just like children. If you think about it, you know that I'm telling it true. Kids can be mean when they all band together and decide that they want to be cruel as a group. Drunk people are much the same, so don't let your guard down! Wear green on St. Patrick's Day! There are tons of great websites out there that sell Irish tees, so go find one now!
All of this was a surprise to me, of course. I am a genuine-article Irish import. I cam here when I was a wee tot back in the yonder years of the 90's when I was naught but 7 years old. Okay, enough of that old-world talk. I'm pretty glad my folks moved us here when they did, because if it had been any earlier we would have been forced into the Union Army or made to carve railroads out of mountains, or something equally terrible.
St. Patrick's Day is a traditional Saint's Day in Ireland, which means it's strictly a religious holiday. We don't eat corned beef usually and we don't feel the need to wear green Irish tees. We have parades in the bigger cities, but we only really do that because of the American influence to do it. In Ireland, we have a special Mass for St. Patrick and the rest of our day is pretty much the same as every other day.
I guess it must be a capital crime in America to come to school on St. Patrick's Day without wearing green. I had no clue that this was traditional in the U.S. at all. I just showed up with my usual cheerful expression on March 17th and found the whole classroom wearing silly Irish tshirts. I froze in my tracks, because I honestly thought the whole class was making fun of me. That's when a boy laughed and pinched me while yelling something about not wearing green. I cried and I left for the day, refusing to go back to class despite my mother patiently explaining everything to me.
I tell you all of this because I want to ready you for a possible storm of pinching on Saint Patrick's Day. If you slip up and forget to wear your Irish drinking tee shirts, then you are setting yourself up for some pain. Drunk people are just like children. If you think about it, you know that I'm telling it true. Kids can be mean when they all band together and decide that they want to be cruel as a group. Drunk people are much the same, so don't let your guard down! Wear green on St. Patrick's Day! There are tons of great websites out there that sell Irish tees, so go find one now!
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