Sunday, October 6, 2013

Self-Sabotage: What It Is And Why You Can Stop It

By Lachlan Haynes


It's easy to forget just how powerful our subconscious minds can be. We are often completely unaware of how our actions (or inaction) are affecting our lives. We may complain that things never work out for us, we always seem to have bad luck, or we just don't have what it takes to be successful.

With this type of thinking, very few people realize that their path to success is really being blocked by their subconscious self-sabotage. That's right; most people don't even know that it's their way of thinking that is hindering their chances of success - and nothing else.

To be able to relieve the problem of self-sabotage it's important to understand the role that fear and emotions play - especially when they are related to our actions. Finding the exact cause of any destructive behavior is the answer to being able to prevent it in the future. So how do you do this? Simple, learn from your failures and don't make the same mistakes twice. Why? Well if you can't identify the cause of the problem then how can you prevent it? But what exactly happens when we self-sabotage?

When we have something we want to accomplish, say losing weight, it's very important to want to achieve that goal both on an intellectual level and on a subconscious level. You see, when overweight people constantly fail to lose weight, or just fail to keep it off; it may be for a number of reasons. It may be because they are scared of the outcome on some subconscious level. They might feel like their fat is protecting them from the outside world; protecting them from reality. It may provide a shell for their insecurity. And suddenly, losing weight isn't a happy ever after solution anymore: it's a threat. So even though might say they want to lose weight, and firmly believe that on an intellectual level, they're subconsciously sabotaging their diets or workout plans rationalizing it by promising themselves that they'll try harder tomorrow.

Those who self-sabotage may also be afraid of what others will think of them should they accomplish their goals. They might not believe they're worthy of the outcome, so they act in ways that will ensure their failure. These destructive efforts are done subconsciously, so even the saboteurs have fooled themselves into thinking they know what they want. If there is any uncertainty in their mind, any doubt, any fear, they will find a way to make sure it doesn't happen. Perhaps this describes you? Have you sabotaged yourself in the past? Are you still doing it now? Are you not able to move forward with your goals, no matter how hard you try?

Time for some good news! We can all overcome this self-sabotage mess. The very first thing you need to do is understand when it's happening - easy right? Wrong! But it can be achieved with deep understanding and conscious awareness of your emotions, thoughts and fears. It's about being brutally honest with yourself. It's about holding yourself to the highest account possible. It's about deciding that your goal is more important than letting yourself off the hook time after time.

You may have tried to accomplish something for a long time without success. If this is true, it may be time to stop and think for a while. Think back. What kind of setbacks and obstacles have you experienced? If you were to experience that right now, would another, perhaps wiser, choice be to enough to overcome that obstacle? Recognize the patterns; is there a certain type of obstacle that's constantly holding you back? Could it be that a certain fear is preventing you from succeeding? Ask yourself: "Why would I sabotage my ways to accomplishment?" This might be able to give you an answer to your problems.

When we take some time to understand how our subconscious mind works we can also come to realize that we are in control of our own destiny (successful or not!) With deeper understanding of our actions (and the impact they have) we can stop self-sabotage. And what happens when we become aware of our self-sabotage and can prevent it? Well, anything you want! When you remove the biggest obstacle to success (yourself) anything is possible for you.




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